Theresa’s Dictionary: Brexit
Every empress, or prospective emperor, has to give the appearance of having “the common touch”. In view of the restricted background of our new empress, I offer her a dictionary in the hope that studying it will help her understand the people she wishes to rule.
- (n – obtuse) “Brexit means Brexit” – a meaningless definition that is self-referential
- (n) – a somewhat vague wish to leave the EU expressed on 23rd June 2016 by a small majority of those voting in the referendum, usually defined as an absence of one or more of a number of things (the exact mix varying from individual to individual):
- migrants (European only, Commonwealth migrants are apparently now OK),
- migrants in general,
- budget contributions (The gross figure – pre rebates – to be entirely available to fund the NHS),
- euro-regulations (apparently it is better to fund British Bureaucrats to independently define very similar regulations to provide consumer protection and to assist with exports meeting international standards). Having A British standard for the UK market and an international standard for the Export market is “good duplication”,
- the Euro (from which we had an opt-out anyway – but we are unlikely to get if we subsequently apply for readmission),
- the European Court of Justice – which tended to adjudicate on obscure inter-government market competition matters. This is distinct from the sort of individual liberty cases heard by the European Court of Human Rights (usually to the intense frustration of the Home Office, and the gastric discomfort of David Cameron),
- the European Court of Human Rights – despite it actually being outside the EU,
- MEPs – like Nigel Farage,
- (n) – (as in Hard Brexit) a complete severance from anything that might be thought to have anything to do with the EU. Such an approach covers the confusion caused by (2) above by ensuring the absence of all the above matters no matter the cost.